Abstract (II)
The Image
I want to finish this section about my home-play images with the one which arguably had, and continues to have, the greatest impact, influence and ongoing potential for me.
So, with a drum roll and a fanfare, may I introduce Abstract (II) – a simple collage of ornamental grasses in our back garden.
Abstract (II)
Appreciating Uncertainty
The Story
Abstract (II) is inspired by Rachel’s own work, ‘Between Seeing and Knowing’, by the other-worldly images of Uta Barth and by the home-play examples shared by the group in earlier weeks, particularly those incorporating shallow depth of field and out of focus techniques.
It presents the results of the most casual, unpressured, uncontrolled method of shooting photographs that I've ever adopted – I chose the 105mm macro lens, opened the shutter wide and walked around the garden placing the camera close to grasses, hedges and shrubs, sometimes contre jour, sometimes into shadow, happily clicking away without attempting to look through the viewfinder. In different times, I know I've used the camera to retain objectivity and distance but here I was fully engaged, immersed – suddenly I was aware that an hour had passed, and I’d taken 137 photographs. It was time to come back into the house, for my first opportunity to see what I’d created.
It was as if I’d stepped through the wardrobe into a magical land. Not the Narnia of White Witches and ice, but a land of warm, simple, intimate, unthreatening dreams and soft colours; of memories and ‘half remembered names and faces, but to whom do they belong?’ (to quote a half-remembered song). Ethereal and weightless, the results felt detached from the everyday experience of my everyday life.
In retrospect
In her series ‘Between Seeing and Knowing’, Rachel asks:
“Is it possible to rest in uncertainty and appreciate what is, without reaching for labels and explanations?”
And, a year ago, I can hear myself replying “no chance!!!” With my mathematical and scientific background – a world of knowledge and data – I wouldn’t expect ‘abstract’ to be a favoured genre and, if I did make grudging steps in that direction, that it would be towards clean lines and shapes, sharp angularity, precise geometry. I would never have predicted I could be mesmerised by soft, dreamy, (literally) unfocussed images of grasses. Now, if Rachel repeats her question – much to my amazement – I’ll answer differently:
“Yes, yes, yes, I did, I can, I’m doing it. And it’s a wonderful experience”.
Most immediately, this image has reignited my interest and excitement about other in-camera techniques – ICM, shallow depth of field, bokeh, LE, multiple exposure, movement blur – not, as in my previous forays, from a purely technical viewpoint but as a means to better represent my feelings, particularly of un-certitude in an imperfect world. But, more broadly ‘Abstract (II)’ has led me to re‑think my sense of self, sense of place, my creative expression, my photographic process, my ideas about certitude and, excitingly, what I want my photography to be for, where it might take me.
In fact, into finding a lot more than that ‘focus’ which the course-title had promised me!